i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize