If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
there is glitter all over my balls
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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