i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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