After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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