I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
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