so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize