Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize