I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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