I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
COCAINE IS GR8
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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