I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
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And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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