I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I feel like abortions should bother me more
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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