Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize