Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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