the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
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:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
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You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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