How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize