i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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