Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
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