I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize