Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize