babies were throwing up all over the place
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize