So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
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No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
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I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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