ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
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I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
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Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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