there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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