I'm jealous of your bromance
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize