I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
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making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
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The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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