Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
My balls are so social today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
third nipple confirmed
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize