we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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