he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
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He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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