he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
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