There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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