it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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