You're completely useless in the revolution.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
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He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
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Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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