Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
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Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
there is puke in my bra ... again
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