You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
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He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
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I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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