Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize