So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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