Texts From Last Night

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  (563): View more from Iowa

  My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood

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  (563): My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood http://tfl.nu/k7f1
  Replies (1) Good night (1033) Bad night (1561) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now

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  (917): I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now http://tfl.nu/4qek
  Replies (22) Good night (4159) Bad night (644) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..

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  (651): You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold.. http://tfl.nu/rd4a
  Replies (18) Good night (5664) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.

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  (519): Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out. http://tfl.nu/jzw3
  Replies (19) Good night (608) Bad night (4281) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?

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  (847): another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life? http://tfl.nu/u1gt
  Replies (29) Good night (1010) Bad night (4432) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  her facebook's as public as her vagina

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  (803): her facebook's as public as her vagina http://tfl.nu/w3ii
  Replies (43) Good night (3087) Bad night (2450) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well

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  (757): I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well http://tfl.nu/14t6
  Replies (7) Good night (4377) Bad night (1142) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?

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  (360): Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me? http://tfl.nu/3uhh
  Replies (16) Good night (1066) Bad night (3519) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned

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  (714): considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned http://tfl.nu/7fpn
  Replies (3) Good night (3258) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.

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  (978): I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far. http://tfl.nu/izah
  Replies (7) Good night (669) Bad night (3231) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?

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  (802): So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going? http://tfl.nu/1d2j
  Replies (8) Good night (1727) Bad night (759) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.

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  (641): Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings. http://tfl.nu/iq9m
  Replies (4) Good night (1414) Bad night (571)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..

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  (248): Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced.. http://tfl.nu/34jd
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.

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  (513): He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet. http://tfl.nu/9hfz
  Replies (3) Good night (497) Bad night (637) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.

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  (847): Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos. http://tfl.nu/unc3
  Replies (16) Good night (1661) Bad night (371) Order T-Shirt

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