i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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