Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
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I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
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Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
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