Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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