With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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