He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize