wanna go halves on a baby?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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