i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize