you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Pants are for mortals
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Randomize