Your tits are I can't wait for
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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