i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize