you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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