Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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