The best revenge is premature balding
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize